Friday, July 30, 2010

Things Men Say

I can't believe July is already over and I've survived the severe heat and humidity of July in DC. One thing I did smarter this year was not even attempting to blow dry my hair in this weather. I may not have gotten smarter about men but I survived my crazy experiences with them. Here's just a sample of the crazy (or funny) things I've heard from the mouths of men this month:

  • I haven't worn underwear since '97. -Local singer/songwriter
  • I call tattoos on women 'tramp stamps'. -Recent transplant from Boston
  • For $750 million I would be a straight woman. -Gay guy friend on the Tiger Woods divorce
  • Not sure why, but I find you interesting. -Guy asking for my number at a bar
  • I masturbate almost every day. What can I say, I think I'm sexy. -Video editor friend
  • I have the best excuse ever for not calling: I had a stroke. -Guy I went out with last year and ran into on the street
  • And while he said it many years ago, I just heard Jenny Sanford tell Oprah recently that her ex-husband Mark Sanford told her that he didn't want the word 'faithful' in their wedding vows. That worked out well.

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